Reclaim Your Power: Divorce with Integrity, Respect And Grace

Today we are going to be discussing another of the Daily Divorce Affirmations that I post. “I have the power to come out on the other side of my divorce with integrity, respect and grace.” What can happen a lot of times in divorce is that because its an adversarial process, things can get heated.

Especially if it’s a high conflict divorce and if the other party is doing things that are underhanded.

Sometimes it’s like you get sucked into it and you want to try some of those things yourself. But here is what I can say, as satisfying as that may feel in the moment, it creates more damage and chaos.  The more that you interact with it, the worse that it gets. And it builds, and it builds and it builds. But you do have the power to say that in this process, you are not going to do that. 

While you will advocate for yourself and your children, you wont stoop to doing things that aren’t in integrity.  Or that are disrespectful and you will do what you can to mitigate some of those things. That what you have the power to change that you are going to take control and change. 

In doing that and having the respect and integrity and the grace as you are going through the process. And staying in alignment with the person that you want to be coming out on the other side of it.

You are creating a better environment for your children. That you are creating less conflict. 

Now, the other person is still going to do what they are going to do.  But you have the power and control to do what you want to do.  If you want to have that calm and you want to truly protect your children. Then you are going to try to take those steps to not stoop to that level.

To try to interact with the other party with integrity and respect and do so while you are standing up. And while you are advocating and not stooping to name calling or any of those things.

So that’s the background about where that came from. Hopefully that can help you in your life as you move forward because you do have a choice. You do have a choice in how you interact with your ex and with the courts.  And there should be limits on what you are willing to do to win. 

There should be boundaries in place on what you are willing to expose your children to in the name of winning.

Because the more focused you are on winning at any cost, the less focused you are on your children. And the less focused you are on insuring that they make it through this process relatively unscathed. 

If you found this information useful and you would like more information or maybe you would like to work with me, I would like to offer you a complimentary 30 minute coaching session with me.  You can follow the link in the description and it will take you to my scheduling software where you can set that up. 

This or any advice that has been given by Heather Debreceni is not meant to replace or superseded the advice of your attorney or the acting family therapist involved in your case and does not constitute legal or psychological counseling.

NOTE: Transcripts may be edited for clarity. This blog post is a transcript or written version of the interview. It is not an admissible testimony nor is it intended to provide legal or psychological advice.



About The Author

Heather Debreceni

In 2004, after getting a job in Law Enforcement, Heather left her husband and started the divorce process. Like many mothers in her situation, she naively thought that getting divorced would be the end of the chaos that her failing marriage had created in her and her children’s lives. She now uses her divorce experience to create strategic divorce coaching programs which help mothers turn the chaos of divorce into confident, calm and respect filled lives. Heather is the Founder and Host of the Empowered Divorce Summit which empowers individuals as they navigate through the divorce process. Now a podcast, it provides listeners with access to insightful interviews with experts on divorce, relationships and parenting. She is also an Ordained Non-Denomination Christian Reverend as well as a student of the Buddhist & First Nationals faith and spirituality. Heather supports her clients as they walk through the spiritual rebirth that occurs for many women after divorce. Heather also tours around the country with her family giving talks about Divorce, Ethics, Parenting, Personal Responsibility, Spirituality and Women's Empowerment as well as teaching about Leadership, Business and Entrepreneurship.

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