Today’s Chaos To Calm Moment is based on one of my quotes. “The most profound changes in the world start as minor changes within yourself.” I learned early on that creating positive change for others actually starts by creating positive change for yourself.

Think of yourself as having this tank inside that’s full of the positive energy you’ve created in your life.  And all that energy that you can use to help people, your children, and your spouse, everything. All that positive energy is stored inside a tank, inside of you.

When you’re constantly giving positive energy and you’re constantly making withdrawals from that tank, it starts to get depleted. And thats when you start to get burnt out and you start to feel helpless.  And it just feels overwhelming.

By investing in time where you’re refilling that tank with positive energy, that is a concept called self-care… Some of you may have heard of it. 

Doing things that are self-care, by reading the book, taking a walk in nature, going to see a movie. Or spending time with friends, getting your hair and nails done, playing with makeup, buying new clothes, whatever it is. 

But that “thing” that helps you refill that tank, that helps you take care of you. That invests in you, in making you better everyday. Then you’re creating more positivity that you can put out into the world. All because you got to keep that tank filled up.

Now women, especially mothers, like to think, “okay well spending time with my spouse might put some in the tank.” Or maybe with the kids. The reality is that while other people can make small deposits in your positive bank, your good juju bank. Your spouse, your children, or your friends. While they can all make small deposits in there, the reality is that its just not enough.You have to make the majority of them. 

You have to take the time to do that investment in yourself.

By investing in creating positive change for you personally. Not for your kids. Not for your husband. Not for your friends, not for the people at church, just for you. Creating positive energy for yourself, will help you keep that going and to be able to help more people.  And the more people that you help, the more positive change that you create.

Don’t be a martyr, it’s okay to take the bubble bath.  It’s okay to go to a movie by yourself.  It’s okay to window shop. It’s okay to do any of those things, its okay to take that time.  In fact, it’s vitally important that you do so. Because you’re ensuring that you’ll be able to be there for your children, your spouse and your community.

That is how you create positive change for others, by creating positive change for yourself.

And those are little things, they’re not even huge things. But they make a huge difference in the amount of energy that your able to put out.

As always I would like to offer you a complimentary Chaos To Calm Power session.  It will give you a chance to share some of where you are at in your journey with me and for us to see whether or not we would be a good fit to work together.

What is your favorite self care thing to do?  How does it help you create change in the world?  Let me know in the comments below.

NOTE: Transcripts may be edited for clarity. This blog post is a transcript or written version of the interview. It is not an admissible testimony nor is it intended to provide legal or psychological advice.

This or any advice that has been given by Heather Debreceni is not meant to replace or superseded the advice of your attorney or the acting family therapist involved in your case and does not constitute legal or psychological counseling.